Just another post..............
here I am again... middle in the night ... soon it will dawn..... Today I didn't report back to camp.. because I reported sick.. Been having Migraine for the past 3 days.... argh!!!! Anyway.. been rather moody.. really can't seem to be happy or have fun in anything...
It seems like there is nothing interesting in life.... People around me are busy... or rather I'm too poor and broke to go out... Nothing come cheap or free in this world... The moment I leave the house ... There the money counter starts.... from the bus to everything...
At home ? people are too busy or concern with their personal stuff... Sis = Studying/throwing lady tantrum....... Bro=Playing MY computer/girlfriend.... Mum=Working/house work/sleep... Father=sleeping/sleeping...grandpa=sleeping/cant hear(hearing problem) ..... Sometimes, I really think whether anyone in my family really think or see that I exist... Or I'm just someone that is taking up another few Oz. of air and inch of space..... I wonder.............
Sometimes, I just feel like crying... reason??? I really don't know... There is just a kind of feeling inside... I think is loneliness... I really missed the daze during my secondary school and daze during my BMT... Life was fun.. filled and exciting... I don't need to think wat to do next and I have bunch of great friends around me.... All are around me to cheer me...
I really want to thank my godbro... he is always there for me.. But I guess the attention is limited... Sometimes, I felt that I'm really bothering him... Was talking to a friend yesterday... She ask me am I really bothering his privacy.. and his family.. but he is the only person that I now really can relate to ... A person who is still concern about me.... talking to me constantly and cheering me... Maybe can call me a attention seeker.... but I guess all human wants attention ... but to a certain degree... but for me .. i only have one person to give me the attention....
I really feel that now my life is really a lonely journey... maybe I should continue my OWN journey.... To where? I also don't know... Maybe to a place where i can find peace and love and joy.... Heaven? Maybe.......................
I think my post is to another anonymous that who is interested in another boring life.... Thanks anyway.. at least you bother....
It seems like there is nothing interesting in life.... People around me are busy... or rather I'm too poor and broke to go out... Nothing come cheap or free in this world... The moment I leave the house ... There the money counter starts.... from the bus to everything...
At home ? people are too busy or concern with their personal stuff... Sis = Studying/throwing lady tantrum....... Bro=Playing MY computer/girlfriend.... Mum=Working/house work/sleep... Father=sleeping/sleeping...grandpa=sleeping/cant hear(hearing problem) ..... Sometimes, I really think whether anyone in my family really think or see that I exist... Or I'm just someone that is taking up another few Oz. of air and inch of space..... I wonder.............
Sometimes, I just feel like crying... reason??? I really don't know... There is just a kind of feeling inside... I think is loneliness... I really missed the daze during my secondary school and daze during my BMT... Life was fun.. filled and exciting... I don't need to think wat to do next and I have bunch of great friends around me.... All are around me to cheer me...
I really want to thank my godbro... he is always there for me.. But I guess the attention is limited... Sometimes, I felt that I'm really bothering him... Was talking to a friend yesterday... She ask me am I really bothering his privacy.. and his family.. but he is the only person that I now really can relate to ... A person who is still concern about me.... talking to me constantly and cheering me... Maybe can call me a attention seeker.... but I guess all human wants attention ... but to a certain degree... but for me .. i only have one person to give me the attention....
I really feel that now my life is really a lonely journey... maybe I should continue my OWN journey.... To where? I also don't know... Maybe to a place where i can find peace and love and joy.... Heaven? Maybe.......................
I think my post is to another anonymous that who is interested in another boring life.... Thanks anyway.. at least you bother....
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